extraordinary.

It's the small things that matter.

The smiles across a crowded room

The look when you catch each others eyes.

I've got to admit, sometimes I can't even believe how stupid I can be.

I mean forgetting I have hair dye on my head?

Brilliant one there!

This blog isn't really about anything in particular and isn't the most important.

There's no aim to it, I was just in the mood to write.

When I sit down and think about it the words just tumble out.

But today I'm having one of those writers blocks.

I can feel what I want to write

but I can't find the words to describe it.

I bet you don't remeber half the things i'l never forget.

what's the harm in believing?

Ever since I was a little girl I've believed in most things.

Fate

Fairy tales

Magic

Heaven

Father Christmas

the tooth fairy.

Some of these things like father Christmas, i know are not real.

But still, sometimes it's just nice to believe in something. isn't it?

When we were small and still children, we did not question the existence of Father Christmas or even the easter bunny.

We just belived.

It wasn't even a figment of our over reactive imagination.

We were taught by the adults who cared about us to trust and have faith in.

The tooth fairy, never seen before.

She is still real in the minds of children everywere.

Why?

Because adults taught them to have faith.

When isit that you go from having faith, to growing up and lose it?

It seems once we lose it we gain nothing in return.

We start to worry about every little thing which could be solved with a little less thinkibng and a little more faith.

Fate is like a learning curve to get us through a certain experience whether it's pleasant or not.

Can fate be avoided? if it can, why do we still allow things to happen?

Overall we are in control of what happens from day to day.

Fate is merely there to help you out in the situations which you can't do.

There are some things that will happen no matter what we do.

Everything starts from somewhere.

There is always a beginning.

Love at first sight?

It is rare, but yes it does exist.

We are constantly looking for the perfect friend, perfect job, perfect boy/girl friend, perfect everything.

Each person you meet, you will discover that in their mind there is always something better then what they already have.

Just the same as you think.

In reality, nine times out of ten if you stop and take a look at what you already have you will discover you already have your own little fairytale.

Therefore I truly believe in Father Christmas, the tooth fairy and even the Easter bunny.

They do not appear in the physical sense, but in each and everyone of our hearts.

Despite the fall outs, illnesses, heartbreak ect. at the time of Christmas not one tear of sadness is shed.

Every Christmas people are laughing and smiling. Bad thoughts are momentarily forgotten.

Father Christmas is not a person, but a spirit which comes alive in all of us for a short time each year.

He allows us to see hope, have joy and expand our horizons.

Surely somehow we can expand this feeling to last the whole year?

Believe in fairy tales and defy the impossible.

i miss you.

I can't believe it's nearly been a year.

If you asked me, it seems like it was just yesterday.

When I think about it, i miss you so much.

You were there to talk to.

I remember how we use to have the love/hate relationship.

Looking back it makes me laugh how I over reacted about the little things.

I use to hate it when you came over and played with my toys.

They were mine.

My mum use to tell me off and send me to bed whilst you were aloud to play with them on the floor.

It memories like this which make me laugh now.

Somewhere along the line, it changed.

You made me laugh, I gave you all my best advice I could give.

I feel proud when you come to me for help.

It's like I've lost a best friend.

You mean the world to me.

i'm a bit stuck for words today.

it's official.

So I sent it off, got the reply.

Starting September I'm back off to college.

I think this is a good thing.

I just hope it's not going to be weird.

Sometimes you really frustrate me.

I can hardly stand to talk to you.

I don't understand what your expecting from me.

I try to do things right and you just throw it back in my face saying it's not good enough.

Nothing is good enough for you!

I wish you would get off my case and let me be a teenager please?

You always rant on about 'when I was younger I was always out'

Blahblahblah.

How do you expect me to learn if I can't make my own mistakes?

I just get a bit fed-up sometimes.

i trust you more now, then i ever have before.

Some days I get so fed up.

But when I see you. it makes it so much better.

It's not long till i will be jetting off somewhere far away.

The flight, I have to accomplish on my own.

Which is a big scary step.

It'l all be worth it though.

2 weeks in the sun.

Even better it's 2 weeks with you.

I want someone to think I'm worth taking care of.

who knows what's around the corner?

You casually walked past.

Not a care in the world.

I hadn't seen you before that.

But now it seemed like you were everywhere I went.

Not that I was complaining.

The more I saw you, the more I actually saw you.

Being around you made me feel warm and fussy inside.

Was this the start something special or was I a just having one of those days?

I can't do anything without you.

what are you doing here?

I still remember the first day,

it's clear in my head.

Walking up to the door, not knowing which way to turn.

I got told, 'head up to the third floor over there.'

Great directions.

At first I didn't know if I was in the right place.

I remember feeling scared and alone.

Here I was, standing in the huge place, with no one I knew within 50 miles of me.

I had two options, talk to someone or keep to myself.

I've never been one to talk to people I don't know.

Too shy for my own good.

I care too much what people think of me.

But for some reason, that day I spoke up.

And from there I didn't stop talking.

I really think I've found myself this year.

Apart from one incident, I'm feeling pretty darn good about myself.

I've got everything I want at the moment and I intend to keep it that way.

Nothing I like better then an audience.

there's only one way.

I don't need them all, I just need the one.
I'm not one of those people who goes from one thing to another with no after thought.
I like to stick around, make it worth while.
Make memories that will last a lifetime.

Maybe now's the time to be brave.

there are no guarantee's

some people hide from who they really are
others eventually accept who they are
but sometimes its the tough moments that help you realise who you've finally become
it's takes really balls to stand up for what you believe in.
I've always been one to stand back from the uproar
the one who just agrees and goes along with what ever just because it's easier that way.


this may be crazy soon but who knows?

nobody's fool.

Life seems all abit unlived at the moment.
Day in day out is all the same.
Everyone presumes to know were i'm going and what i'm doing.
But they couldn't be more wrong.
I'm just excisting.
I want to live my own dream now.

The best is yet to come.

the sun rises in the east.

Sometimes I wish I knew what you were thinking.
Sometimes I wish you would tell me how you feel.
Sometimes I wish I was better then what I am.

Why does it feel like you don't want to see me?

i deserve better then this.

I hate planning.
It's so gay.
I don't see the point in it to be totally honest.
Okay, a little planning can work it's just not when you plan things like 6.00am get up, 6.17 do this, 7.18 do this for one hour etc etc..
Things change, you don't know whats going to happen when you wake up so why plan every little tiny thing and how long it's going to take you?
UGH
Little things seem to annoy me at the moment.
Like my house.
I see it all day, everyday.
And it always looks the same!
It's so boring. -.-
Note to self - change room around a bit SOON
I dislike getting receipts too.
What is the point in a little piece of paper telling me what I've bought?
Fair enough if it's something i might need to return one day, but for a bottle of coke?
No thank you!
In other news i am rather liking the colour blue at the moment.
I feel like I'm cheating on purple.

Nothings better then spending the day with you.